Early Life Crisis is a term I developed from “midlife crisis,” but it happens much earlier—right now, in my early adulthood. It is not a single event, but a continuous state shaped by pressure, uncertainty, and unstable routines.
In my world, smoking becomes the most concrete expression of this crisis. It starts as curiosity, then turns into a way to cope with loneliness, anxiety, and the overwhelming transition into a new life stage. Gradually, it becomes a dependency. The act of smoking no longer solves anything—it only creates a temporary pause.
Early Life Crisis, for me, is the coexistence of awareness and self-destruction. I know smoking is damaging my body and mental health, yet I continue. It reflects a contradiction between control and loss of control, between wanting stability and unconsciously moving toward imbalance.
This project takes the form of a personal diary, documenting my relationship with cigarettes over time. Each cigarette carries a fragment of memory—a moment of isolation, reflection, or escape. Through this work, smoking is not just a habit, but a lens to understand how an early life crisis forms, repeats, and slowly reshapes everyday life.